The Power of Staying Present

“What if my parent gets worse?”
“What if I can’t handle it?”

If you’ve ever found yourself spiraling in the land of what-ifs, you’re not alone. For a long time, I lived there. The unknowns of caregiving especially when supporting aging parents used to consume me. I would try to predict every possible scenario, every crisis that might come, and in the process I lost sight of what was actually happening right in front of me.

Then a counselor shared a metaphor that changed everything.

Imagine you’re a repair person showing up at a door. You don’t know what’s broken inside. But you arrive with your toolkit, ready to handle whatever problem is on the other side.

That became my caregiving posture. Instead of obsessing over the dozens of things that could go wrong, I started trusting myself to meet what was happening, moment by moment.

And today, in my prayer group, someone said words that landed like a two-edged sword:
“Help me stay present and purposeful, not perfect.”

Ouch. That hit deep. Because it named what I’ve been stumbling toward all along. Perfection isn’t possible not in caregiving, not in parenting, not in life. But presence and purpose? That’s where the real power lies. I totally resemble this how can I live more present and purposeful? That’s the question I’m sitting with now.

Here’s what I’ve learned: this shift isn’t just about stress management, it’s about survival in the sticky, tricky, and ick of caregiving. The Adolescence of Aging is a stage filled with uncertainty. Roles are shifting, independence is wobbling, and both parent and adult child are trying to figure out how to live in this in-between. If you get lost in the what-ifs, you miss the moments of connection, dignity, and even humor that are available right now.

The truth is, we’re never fully prepared. None of us got a manual for this stage of life. But what we do have is the ability to adapt, to lean into our tools, and to show up with presence. And sometimes, that’s more than enough.

The key takeaway? Staying present doesn’t erase the challenges, but it frees us to actually live the moments we’re in whether they’re messy, meaningful, or a little bit of both.

So let me ask you: Have you ever found yourself paralyzed by the “what-ifs”? What helps you stay grounded and maybe even purposeful in the now? Share in the comments your words may be the sword-edge reminder someone else needs today.

Want some company, tune into the People in the Squeeze Podcast wherever you get your podcasts. It is like having a conversation with a good friend, sharing stories, tears and of course giggles on the insanity of this moment. Join us!